Scenes from an Italian restaurant

Scene one

I have a new mobile phone. Among other interesting features, it has Sat Nav. As we had to reach the hotel and check in, prior to meeting in the restaurant, I decided to try it out. It would probably have helped if I’d had the instructions with me!

To Lovely Boss: ‘I’m surprised we made it, actually. When I entered the co-ordinates into my phone, it tried to send me to Berlin!’

Scene two

Lovely Boss is a footy fanatic, and his team are Hull City, who are apparently doing remarkably well. He tells us that tomorrow he’s driving from the west coast to the east coast and back again, to see them play. He tries to explain it to me:

‘It’s as if you’d suddenly discovered another six Shakespeare plays that you never knew existed. That’s what it’s like for me, after 104 years of rubbish’.

I understand this.